Number Six

AN ODE TO HARRIET MIERS

Harriet Miers
Somehow aspires
To work at the ol’ Supreme Court
When O’Connor retires
And returns to the shires
To take care of her ailing consort.

When Bush chose Ms. Miers
From all the appliers
Who thought they’d be good for that spot.
He touched off some fires
Among the deniers
Who thought that his choice was not hot.

Poor Harriet Miers.
She seldom inspires
Support from the Right or the Left.
The Left’s filled with criers
And the Right lately tires
Of noms sans ideological heft.

O!  Harriet Miers!
You have so few buyers!
Your High Court robe and seat might be lost.
Just like our empires
And corp’rate high flyers,
How long can it be ‘fore you're tossed?

--LJC


BRIDGET OF PAMPELONNE

I want to lie down in green valleys
I want to sprawl out along hills
I want to feel free by the river
I want to give Bardot the chills

Why can't I lie down out in public?
Why can't I do just what I want?
Why can't I give Bardot the fever?
Because she's really old and she lives in France

That sound that you hear is the scraper
As my barrel's bottom gets scoured
Six straight weeks of poetry's drained me
This poet's no longer empowered

So I issue this poetry coupon
It's yours to redeem or to hold
It's good for one meaningful stanza
From Len, cuz his stuff's good as gold.

--Mark Trail


‘Though Mr. Trail is kind,
It has been opined
That my verse is worth less than is gold.
As for good, that’s debated.
Let’s say it’s not hated.
It’s less close to gold than to mold.

--LJC


Bev Doolittle, Thomas Kinkaid, Charles Wysocki, Billy Flanagan. These names are more than mere trademarks. These are the artists of the cute, the quaint, and the insane. The power of their works reverberate through our inner organs like a bad Hungarian meal. And they can all be found here at the MoseArt Discount Factory Warehouse. If you've seen it on a discounted calendar from 1998, you'll find it here at the MoseArt Discount Factory Warehouse at $19.99. We have stacks of original van Goghs, Monets, and Rothkos just laying around for the taking--um, I mean, buying. And once they're gone, Herschel van Gogh, Murray Monet, and Mark Rothko will be happy to churn out more! They're manacled in the basement so that we can pass the savings along to you. And you can take my word for it, or I'm not Big Daddy Mammon! Remember, that's the MoseArt Discount Factory Warehouse, three blocks south of the charnel house on Route 16!

--LJC